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17 Aug 2017
Summer Fling or the Real Thing?
It is not unusual for people to start a romance during summer, whether that’s on holiday or at home. The sun and warm weather (if we are lucky), and perhaps a little bit of alcohol all lower inhibitions and can combine into an exciting heady feeling of lust.
The question many of us will be asking, now that the summer is over – should you chalk up the liaison as a summer fling, or does the relationship have the makings of a proper relationship?
There is no doubt that some partnerships that start abroad, can make it in the long run, but they are probably the exception rather than the rule. Many things would make it unlikely – geographical distance, long-distance romance, financial burden of seeing one another, possible language issues as well as cultural differences to overcome.
However if you met at home, or you met someone abroad that happens to live near your home location, then you may have more of a chance, albeit there are still some things to consider:
Perhaps ‘talking’ was not your first priority when you initially met! But in an everyday relationship – good communication will be key.
If it’s a fling – there may be awkward silences, one of you may be holding the conversation more than the other.
If it’s the real thing – conversation should flow easily, you probably cannot wait until you can speak again. Both of you will have interesting things to contribute and will take equal turns in meeting, phoning, texting etc.
When you were on holiday entertainment probably came naturally – walks on the beach, meals in restaurants, and ice cream in a café as you watched the world go by… But now back in the real world you will both have to make an effort if you want to turn your romance in to a relationship.
If both of you are excited about meeting, are making an effort to suggest nice places to go and exciting things to do. Arrive on time, and look the part – then you are well on your way.
But if you find you are putting in all of the effort, one or more date has been altered or cancelled at the last minute – then it may be time to face facts.
Rose Tinted Glasses
During a summer fling, let’s face it you are not looking for ‘marriage’ material, but if you decide to take your relationship beyond a holiday romance then you will need to consider whether the person meets your long-term needs. Of course you do not need to decide this straight away, but fundamentally all of us have a ‘list’ of what we want from ‘the one’ and eventually this will have to be faced.
Try to consider early on what is really important to you and them and see if you are a real match!Tweet